GIRLS NIGHT OUT… IS MARY JO READY FOR THIS! Episode Five of “ONE TRICK PONY,” the Web Series by John Rakestraw
NARRATOR: JO stands across the street from the museum drinking her Chia Tea Espresso waiting for the night cleaning crew to leave. The museum had been closed for some hours and she watches the lights go off on each floor one by one as the cleaning crew worked their way down. All the lights were finally off except for the security room on the corner. She watches as the crew leaves and say goodbye to SHEL, he the guard on duty most nights. He lets them all out and watched them get safely to their cars. Shel turn to go back in…
JO: Shel, we need to talk.
SHEL: Is that you Jo? What the hell are you doing up so late. I have a good reason, I’m working. What’s yours?
JO: I’m working to, you know that a Private Investigator job has crazy hours just like your job.
NARRATOR: You are reading ONE TRICK PONY by John Rakestraw
ONE TRICK PONY: A Web Series I tried to get it off the ground but never got much done with it… so here it is being put up as a script to be read. I’ll put up an episode every once in a while, as I get them done. I hope you enjoy the show.
Episode One can be found by clicking on the link.
NARRATOR: Our books are available at Amazon.com
SHEL: Still trying to sell me on the idea of us being together. Well, come on in and “girlfriend” me.
NARRATOR: SHEL makes the quotes signs with is fingers as he says girlfriend. JO enters the security room and sits.
JO: I want to speak to you.
SHEL I could have said we’re closed and made you come back when we’re open. So, what is it?
JO: I’ll make this quick. How would you like to make twenty grand in cash? I mean it. All we have to do is steal the gold Roman coins and jewelry that’s here in the museum.
SHEL: Bad idea… first it’s locked in a vault overnight. Second I don’t know the combination and third, I’d get fired. There’s also a fourth, how does this keep my nose clean? We would most likely, with my luck, get caught and go to jail. Our first date would be getting fingerprinted and having our rights read to us.
JO: Shel it would save your house, we could get married, you have the place already booked. We could have the honeymoon that you and Gail were going to do. It’s all perfect. We steal something the museum already has insured and we all live happily ever after.
SHEL: It sounds perfect… who’s crazy idea was this, and where’s the $20,000 coming from?
JO: Mitch Cannon…
SHEL: You told me you weren’t going to see him until Sunday… you didn’t trust me to come up with the money, did ya?
JO: Have you come up with an idea that could make you $20,000?
SHEL: Sure, I buy a Lottery ticket…
JO: You’re so brilliant… what else?
SHEL: I’ll add a couple of bucks for the kicker option?
JO: We’re saved… the house is safe now.
SHEL: Your idea has issues too. Are you a first rate safe cracker?
JO: No… who has the combination, it must be your boss, the Museum Director. I swear you said it was a woman. I’ve seen you put on the charm. Can’t you charm your way into her pants and get the combination?
SHEL: It’s not that easy—
JO: Why not?
SHEL: I’m not her type.
JO: Shel you’re a man—
SHEL: That’s the problem…
JO: How can that be a problem… she some history nerd who’s never been on a date most likely. You do your best John Travolta on her and she’s putty in your hands.
SHEL: It would work out better if you did your best Olivia Newton-John and then she would be putty in your hands. She gay!
JO: She gay?
SHEL: Yes… she’s always had the hots for you Jo. Ever since we were in school.
JO: Who the hell is your boss?
SHEL: Grace Goodman… I really think you could be the good little woman for her.
JO: Grace (I want you Mary Jo) Goodman. She been trying to have me join her sisterhood for years.
SHEL: Jo, doing this could save my house. Hey, I have a place already booked, you could use it to marry Grace. It’s legal here in our State.
JO: You’re right Shel. Plus, I’d really hate to see that honeymoon go to waste. Grace would look good in a Hogwarts school girl uniform, though it wouldn’t stay on her for long.
SHEL: I thought you wanted to marry ME! Two women in my life have both thrown me over for someone else. At least I get a house out of it.
JO: Shel no one’s throwing you away. We don’t even know if Grace is still interested in me and whether I can pull off being gay long enough to get the combination. Which all has to be done either tonight or tomorrow. Not much time to seduce and run.
SHEL: I know she still interested… she asks about you all the time.
JO: You talk about me with her?
SHEL: We found out that we have the same taste in woman. I‘ve gone out bar trolling with her.
JO: You were Graces wingman?
SHEL: I thought it would be a great way to meet women. It was during the many times that Gail was pissed at me and wasn’t talking or giving out. At least not to me it now seems.
JO: I know you’re not the smartest guy out there at times… but, Shel. You were going to female gay bars. The women there were looking for other women.
SHEL: I finally figure that out after a few bars and after a few week. But, hey, I got a lot of free drinks and good advice from the ladies.
JO: Gay guys teaching strength guys how to dress and gay ladies teach you how to date woman… next on Lifetime Network. (Laughs) So, how do we do this? How do I get ahold of Grace?
SHEL: Tonight’s Friday, right? Grace’s usual haunt is The Pink Lady, which just happens to be across the street from here. You need to get all girly girl. That’s the way she likes her ladies.
JO: I’m not girly girl enough?
SHEL: You are for me, but maybe if you pushed up your hair and your boobs. Added just a hint more make-up and put on your, I’m looking for a wild night, attitude. You got to make her dream night come true.
JO: Alright I’ll go in to the ladies room and girly myself up for you gay boss. Anything to save your sorry ass.
SHEL: Wow, a girlfriend who will sleep with my boss to save my house. You’re not really going to marry her, right?
JO: I’ll do whatever it takes to save your bacon, Shelby. Here I go big boy.
NARRATOR: We hope to see you next time here on the internet. At johnlrakestraw.com!!
We would be honored to have you read our books and buy them from Amazon.com
You’re reading “ONE TRICK PONY” Episode Five by John Rakestraw.